Home > Game Previews, MLB > Game 99 preview: Just quit already, Bobby.

Game 99 preview: Just quit already, Bobby.

1. Jacoby Ellsbury CF – .293/.329/.400
2. Pedro Ciriaco DH – .320/.333/.420
3. Dustin Pedroia 2B – .267/.324/.392
4. Adrian Gonzalez 1B – .293/.333/.435
5. Cody Ross RF – .266/.341/.544
6. Will Middlebrooks 3B – .293/.323/.507
7. Carl Crawford LF – .241/.290/.241
8. Kelly Shoppach C – .278/.366/.537
9. Mike Aviles SS – .260/.283/.407

SP Josh Beckett – 101.1 IP, 79 K, 27 BB, 9 HR, 4.53 ERA, 3.52 FIP, 3.94 xFIP

Look, Bobby, we get it. You don’t care. You certainly don’t care enough to actually look at the things you’re doing and wonder if maybe they’re not the best way to help the team win. If you did, I assume that you would notice that Kelly Shoppach has the best OPS on the team, and that maybe batting him eighth all the time is a bad idea. If you cared, maybe you’d notice that Pedro Ciriaco can’t hit to save his life, and that therefore batting him second is a bad idea. You might also notice that Ciriaco’s one skill is his defense, and that if you have to have him in the lineup (which you don’t, by the way), you should put him in the field, and either give Pedroia a half day off or spare us from the torture that is watching Mike Aviles attempt to play shortstop.

But you don’t care, Bobby. Either that or you’re just stupid. Maybe it’s that. Are you stupid, Bobby? Are you so stupid and stubborn that you will cling to “the catcher hits eighth” even when that catcher is the best hitter you run out there? It certainly seems so. Are you so stupid and stubborn that you will insist on putting the “scrappy” middle infielder in the #2 slot, even when that infielder is a terrible hitter and you’re not even letting him play the infield? Again, it seems so.

Which is it, Bobby? Are you stupid? If so, you should quit. Get your friend Larry to help you look up what quit means, and then do it. Or do you just not care? Are you so disinterested in the success of your ballclub, or so secure in the knowledge that the team’s performance has no impact on your job safety, that you will willingly do whatever you feel like, consequences be damned? If so, again, you should quit. Find some other team to ruin. I’m sure there are lots of clubs out there that would just love to have you come in, run one of their favorite players out of town, and then take the guys that remain from a likely playoff spot to under .500 through a hundred games. I don’t know any off the top of my head, but I’m sure you’ll find one.

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